Relationships - Couples Counselling

Definition of Relationship: “A Connectedness between Two People”

When we enter into a serious relationship most of us want this to last for life. However the reality is very different with almost one in two marriages ending in divorce and a similar figure within same sex relationships also breaking down.

Relationships will have their difficulties over the years and sometimes as a couple, we are able to work these out. However, if we get entrenched or stuck in a pattern of behaviour it is hard to see a way forward, this is where counselling as a couple may be beneficial. You will not be given advice however your counsellor may be able to offer you both a new perspective on your relationship.

Outside factors such as affairs, money, work, shift patterns, stress, tiredness and lack of communication may contribute to the breakdown of a relationship between a couple.

Often, couples who may have longed for a child of their own find the effect of a new baby in the house very demanding and a huge strain is put on the relationship. Couples who find that they cannot have children will have to come to terms with this fact and it can be incredibly difficult. Their relationship will not be as they imagined however, it can still be fulfilling.

When we look at our relationships it is always important to consider the following:-

• What were our expectations at the start?
• When did it change?
• Why did it change?
• What’s different?
• Are each others needs being met?
• What do we want it to be like in the future?
• Do we both want to work on saving the relationship?

A very common cause of breakdown is one partner having an affair. This can lead to issues around lack of trust, feelings of betrayal and apportioning blame. At this difficult time it is necessary to stop and ask why? Although hard to accept for the partner who has not had the affair, there will have been a cause and effect for this to happen.

At A Time To Talk Counselling and Coaching Service, we can help you and your partner explore the feelings around the difficulties in the relationship and give you a safely facilitated space to openly express how you are both feeling. For couples counselling to be of benefit, it is important that you both want to work on the relationship.